Sometimes, I wonder what exactly does the word family mean? To some people, family probably only means to share the good times and despise the bad times. I'm not sure if everyone else feels the same.
I was brought up in a family where my brother and I were taught to protect and take care of each other. Just last week, my mother told me that I've only got one brother and if they were to pass on, we should take good care of each other and look out for each other. My brother and I are quite close. Whenever anything happens, we keep each other in the loop. Just two weeks ago when I was warded, my brother visited me twice. Once on his own and another time with my sis-in-law and niece. Whenever anything happens in the family, be it monetary or just support, we really take care of each other. When I had bleeding while expecting Allyson, I was soo upset. While waiting for Jasper to drive the car up to the porch, I called my brother and after that, he called a few times to make sure I was alright.
From young, my parents, my brother and I never quarrelled over money. To my parents, as long as we have enough to spend and lead a simple life, money should not be a big issue and the cause of quarrels in the family. I believe it's not the same for other parents. Some parents tend to see money in a very very big way. When their children are late in transferring a monthly allowance, they haunt their children like some loansharks. They can't even be bothered to ask politely or check if their children are sufficient themselves. What's most upsetting is if these parents are working themselves, then it dawned on us why they are sooooo uptight over money not being transferred on time when they have a steady stream of income coming in every month. It's ok for outsiders not to understand what their children are going through but these are parents!! If these parents can't even understand their own children's difficulties, then what does the word FAMILY mean at all??? Is it worth it to fall out with their own children just becos of money?!?? Isn't there any other things that are worth considering besides MONEY MONEY all the time!??!
It really breaks one's heart sometimes to hear such stories. Don't these parents ever consider that their children have their own families to feed. Given the rising costs in Singapore these days and the salary not being too high to meet these rising costs, can't these parents be more understanding?? I think these parents are better off being LOANSHARKS then being parents. If they are soooooo hard up for money, then they should not have gotten married at all and just go earn whatever money they want till the day they are being laid in the coffin!!! *ANGER*
I realised that my parents are very understanding. They have never expected us to feed them or transfer money to them. We give a monthly allowance every month to my mother and becos my dad is working, we only give him extras when we get bonus or during his birthdays. Of cos, mum gets part of our bonus and angpows as well :)) Whenever we need their help to look after Allyson, they agree wholeheartedly and in turn ask if she needs to eat anything so they can go to the market and buy them fresh. I felt very very touched. My parents don't talk much but when it comes to a time when we need their help, they try their very best. My mum kept telling me that one of her regrets is not able to look after Allyson on her own. My mother is the panicky sort so it's not wise to leave her with a child who can't articulate what she wants till much later. Moreover, she doesn't have the experience to look after young children. She doesn't mind to look after when Allyson turns 3-4 years old and is able to be quite independent.
Given the rising costs, I'm looking at ways and means to cut cost and save more money. I intend to take up one or two tuition assignments and add some extra money to our household income.
Wish me luck!!! :))
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
A Surge of Warmth
I just had to post this entry now without delay.
I just came back from NTUC. It's their 'OFFER/DISCOUNT' day. Many things were on offer. Incidentally, some of the things on offer only came out today and the last day of the offer is to be on 31 July.
On the way to getting my loaf of Fairprice bread (though not very soft after the 3rd day but it's still palatable and of cos A LOT cheaper than other brands), an elderly auntie and I just got into a chit chat about bread. She was deciding whether to buy another brand's bread compared to FAirprice bread. I just told her that it's indeed cheaper and more worth it to get Fairprice bread. Given the high costs these days, it's wiser to eat slightly harder bread than buy a high price for softer bread. It's not as if Jasper and I can't chew hard stuff. In the end, I think she reckoned it was cheaper and could save more, she got the Fairprice bread. Let's hope her family members won't blame me for giving my views about the bread hahahah
As I was moving out of the Bread aisle, a very nice middle-aged auntie suddenly pounced on me and told me that the musk melon which I had taken earlier is smaller and she offered to give hers which was much bigger to me. OOOHHHH i'm soooooo touched!!!! It has been a very long time since we felt warmth among strangers. I just felt like hugging her at that time. Of cos, I couldn't bear to take what she has chosen for herself. Thus, I declined smilingly and told her to keep for herself. This melon is also a very good buy. Rather big and it only costs $4.99. No gimmicks and everything looks good on the melon.
I managed to get Allyson's kodomo detergent liquid which they seldom have discount. Thus at this NTUC near my home, whatever stocks they have will be gone by evening. I knew I just had to bend down despite my aching back to get the detergent. Today, I bought a few things with the Fairprice branding. Dehumidifier, bread, tang yuan. I think I saved quite a bit hahhaha
Even the sugarless jam and shampoo which I bought were on offer. Especially the Dove shampoo. It's like nearly $1.50 cheaper. I'm sooooooooooo lucky!! hahhah I managed to grab the LAST bottle on the shelf. Phew!!! Today's grocery shopping trip really tired me out. I shall rest after I post this on my blog and enjoy my tang yuan :))
I just came back from NTUC. It's their 'OFFER/DISCOUNT' day. Many things were on offer. Incidentally, some of the things on offer only came out today and the last day of the offer is to be on 31 July.
On the way to getting my loaf of Fairprice bread (though not very soft after the 3rd day but it's still palatable and of cos A LOT cheaper than other brands), an elderly auntie and I just got into a chit chat about bread. She was deciding whether to buy another brand's bread compared to FAirprice bread. I just told her that it's indeed cheaper and more worth it to get Fairprice bread. Given the high costs these days, it's wiser to eat slightly harder bread than buy a high price for softer bread. It's not as if Jasper and I can't chew hard stuff. In the end, I think she reckoned it was cheaper and could save more, she got the Fairprice bread. Let's hope her family members won't blame me for giving my views about the bread hahahah
As I was moving out of the Bread aisle, a very nice middle-aged auntie suddenly pounced on me and told me that the musk melon which I had taken earlier is smaller and she offered to give hers which was much bigger to me. OOOHHHH i'm soooooo touched!!!! It has been a very long time since we felt warmth among strangers. I just felt like hugging her at that time. Of cos, I couldn't bear to take what she has chosen for herself. Thus, I declined smilingly and told her to keep for herself. This melon is also a very good buy. Rather big and it only costs $4.99. No gimmicks and everything looks good on the melon.
I managed to get Allyson's kodomo detergent liquid which they seldom have discount. Thus at this NTUC near my home, whatever stocks they have will be gone by evening. I knew I just had to bend down despite my aching back to get the detergent. Today, I bought a few things with the Fairprice branding. Dehumidifier, bread, tang yuan. I think I saved quite a bit hahhaha
Even the sugarless jam and shampoo which I bought were on offer. Especially the Dove shampoo. It's like nearly $1.50 cheaper. I'm sooooooooooo lucky!! hahhah I managed to grab the LAST bottle on the shelf. Phew!!! Today's grocery shopping trip really tired me out. I shall rest after I post this on my blog and enjoy my tang yuan :))
What have I been doing?
This week of rest has been quite alright for me. I've learnt to be more relaxed and am able to think more in depth into the things that I've been doing or had done or things that has been happening around me.
Just a few days back when I went out with my mother to get something. As my friends may know, my mum has developed a phobia of going out. Thus, we had to settle something urgent so I went over to her house to take her out to settle it. As I took the bus to my mother's place, it suddenly dawned on me that I've really been moving toooo fast all these years. Some may comment that I'm too young to make such a statement but seriously, I've never really stopped to admire the little things in life. As I hopped on the bus and got a seat, I observed how the homemakers are living their life.
Basically, they wake up in the morning, settle their husband and children, maybe take the children to school, then proceed to the market or supermarket to get the day's food or some groceries. Even if they didn't go to the market or supermarket, they probably go home to do some household chores like washing clothes, cleaning the floor etc. After that, they probably start preparing lunch, take a rest and wait for their children to be home.
I tried this the last two days. I packed breakfast for Jasper, changed diapers for Allyson, fed her, talked to her a little then say goodbye to my hubby and daughter. Then I went home, put the clothes to wash, boiled the day's water and take a look at what I should be taking down from the freezer to cook for Allyson tonight. We have tingkat so I need not have to worry too much about our dinner. After hanging the clothes, I take a walk out to buy newspapers and grab some fruits or some other necessities for the family. In my mind, I'm looking for the value buys to try to safe a bit of money. Some may start laughing at me for becoming an 'Auntie' hahaha. I'm not sure if I can continue with this kind of life if I become a full time homemaker but I'm sure enjoying these few days. I even told my mum that I can come take her out like 3 times a week if I decided to be a homemaker.
I believe that I won't be the kind to coop myself up at home. I may take up some part time jobs or maybe just give tuition once Allyson starts to go to school for the day. I may even enrol myself in some courses as well.
I can plan my household chores like what to do for each day and maybe settle down to plan for the night's menu or experiment with some new dishes. I'm sooo looking forward to this kind of life. BUT, it really takes a very brave me to quit my job and do this full time. With the INFLATION these days, it's really not easy to stop work. Many of the stay-home mums are trying to go back to the workforce. After discussion with Jasper, we decided to shelf this idea till he takes home a 5-figure salary every month hahahhha
Just a few days back when I went out with my mother to get something. As my friends may know, my mum has developed a phobia of going out. Thus, we had to settle something urgent so I went over to her house to take her out to settle it. As I took the bus to my mother's place, it suddenly dawned on me that I've really been moving toooo fast all these years. Some may comment that I'm too young to make such a statement but seriously, I've never really stopped to admire the little things in life. As I hopped on the bus and got a seat, I observed how the homemakers are living their life.
Basically, they wake up in the morning, settle their husband and children, maybe take the children to school, then proceed to the market or supermarket to get the day's food or some groceries. Even if they didn't go to the market or supermarket, they probably go home to do some household chores like washing clothes, cleaning the floor etc. After that, they probably start preparing lunch, take a rest and wait for their children to be home.
I tried this the last two days. I packed breakfast for Jasper, changed diapers for Allyson, fed her, talked to her a little then say goodbye to my hubby and daughter. Then I went home, put the clothes to wash, boiled the day's water and take a look at what I should be taking down from the freezer to cook for Allyson tonight. We have tingkat so I need not have to worry too much about our dinner. After hanging the clothes, I take a walk out to buy newspapers and grab some fruits or some other necessities for the family. In my mind, I'm looking for the value buys to try to safe a bit of money. Some may start laughing at me for becoming an 'Auntie' hahaha. I'm not sure if I can continue with this kind of life if I become a full time homemaker but I'm sure enjoying these few days. I even told my mum that I can come take her out like 3 times a week if I decided to be a homemaker.
I believe that I won't be the kind to coop myself up at home. I may take up some part time jobs or maybe just give tuition once Allyson starts to go to school for the day. I may even enrol myself in some courses as well.
I can plan my household chores like what to do for each day and maybe settle down to plan for the night's menu or experiment with some new dishes. I'm sooo looking forward to this kind of life. BUT, it really takes a very brave me to quit my job and do this full time. With the INFLATION these days, it's really not easy to stop work. Many of the stay-home mums are trying to go back to the workforce. After discussion with Jasper, we decided to shelf this idea till he takes home a 5-figure salary every month hahahhha
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Parenting
Allyson's 'mushroom head' is changed to another look. My in-laws took her for a hair cut over the weekend. They felt it's better that way. Well, it does look better and anyway, I've only been told after it's done so there's nothing much to say.
I once read in an article that when two persons get together and get married, they are marrying both sides of the family and have to embrace everything and everyone that/who comes with the two persons. I guess it's the same logic with parenting. Once a child is born, the child doesn't belong to the parents alone. we have to embrace whatever advice or actions that are being carried out by grandparents.
I've always thought of harmony in the family. Where need be, I try to keep quiet and just swallow whatever that's given to me. Good or bad advice, I just have to take it in and decide if it can be carried out. If whatever had been done already without my knowledge, then I just have to swallow whatever that is going to come out of my both and still grin and bear with the whole thing and everyone else. To me, what's the point of creating a scene when what's done cannot be undone.
Allyson had taken her many steps without support already. Though still a bit unstable as she tries to walk on her own, I am just very proud of her progress. Seeing her development every day really puts a smile on both Jasper and my face. These days, we put her on a mat and play games with her. Can be tiring but I guess, seeing the smiles and chuckles from her take away all the tiredness for a while.
Of cos, being able to move around on her own is an exciting experience for her. Thus, we need to constantly watch out for her and NEVER NEVER leave her unattended especially if she's walking around. I was told just over the weekend that young kids will definitely fall and hurt themselves when they start to walk. I agree partially but not totally. If we do not be alert with what the kid is doing or worse not even looking at the kid, then I would say it's our fault that the kid gets hurt. I'm sure we are not going to wait till something even more serious happens and still maintain that it's ok for young kids to hurt themselves when they learn to walk!? I don't dare to say that when I care for Allyson, there's no injuries at all BUT I dare to say that I have 100% concentration on her no matter how tired I am after work at night.
Can anyone understand the amount of anguish and sadness that overcame me as a mother but I still have to swallow whatever that is going to come out of my mouth? Seeing my little girl being injured is really upsetting. I just pray that she gets less of the injuries especially on her face area.
I once read in an article that when two persons get together and get married, they are marrying both sides of the family and have to embrace everything and everyone that/who comes with the two persons. I guess it's the same logic with parenting. Once a child is born, the child doesn't belong to the parents alone. we have to embrace whatever advice or actions that are being carried out by grandparents.
I've always thought of harmony in the family. Where need be, I try to keep quiet and just swallow whatever that's given to me. Good or bad advice, I just have to take it in and decide if it can be carried out. If whatever had been done already without my knowledge, then I just have to swallow whatever that is going to come out of my both and still grin and bear with the whole thing and everyone else. To me, what's the point of creating a scene when what's done cannot be undone.
Allyson had taken her many steps without support already. Though still a bit unstable as she tries to walk on her own, I am just very proud of her progress. Seeing her development every day really puts a smile on both Jasper and my face. These days, we put her on a mat and play games with her. Can be tiring but I guess, seeing the smiles and chuckles from her take away all the tiredness for a while.
Of cos, being able to move around on her own is an exciting experience for her. Thus, we need to constantly watch out for her and NEVER NEVER leave her unattended especially if she's walking around. I was told just over the weekend that young kids will definitely fall and hurt themselves when they start to walk. I agree partially but not totally. If we do not be alert with what the kid is doing or worse not even looking at the kid, then I would say it's our fault that the kid gets hurt. I'm sure we are not going to wait till something even more serious happens and still maintain that it's ok for young kids to hurt themselves when they learn to walk!? I don't dare to say that when I care for Allyson, there's no injuries at all BUT I dare to say that I have 100% concentration on her no matter how tired I am after work at night.
Can anyone understand the amount of anguish and sadness that overcame me as a mother but I still have to swallow whatever that is going to come out of my mouth? Seeing my little girl being injured is really upsetting. I just pray that she gets less of the injuries especially on her face area.
Revival
Had a turn of events over the last week and I didn't get my long awaited weekend to have hi-tea with my friends. Instead, I spent last Thursday to Saturday in the hospital.
I was warded for high fever (39.7 degree celsius) and bad back pain which doctors suspect to be kidney infection. After all the blood tests, urine tests, I was found to have stones in both my kidneys. Doc says no danger at the moment, just have to observe for another bout of high fever or severe back pain. A slight portion of my left kidney is a bit swollen and till now after discharge, I still feel the occasional bearable back pain. I was given 2 weeks hospitalisation leave to rest at home. The cause? Probably too much of calcium since I've been a dairy lover since young.
The stay in the hospital was depressing. I was telling Jasper that so long as I do not have fever, I would rather be at home resting than stay in the hospital. Every day, there's someone coming in to the room that I'm staying. Some of them came in very very distressed. The rest of the patients who have been staying for quite a while didn't look too good.
The ward that I was in is under Urology. Most of the patients who were in that ward were moving around with the urine bags. It could be kidney failure or probably other illnesses.
It was surprising that many of them in the ward were rather young people maybe in their early thirties to mid-forties. There was a young man in his early twenties there too. Of cos there were a few elderly but what dawned on me was illnesses are attacking the rather young.
I was wondering, at this age, it should be a world of discovery. There's so much to do. Time shouldn't be spent living the rest of the days in the hospital. My stay in the hospital made me realise that I should take things slower than what I'm doing now. What's the point of moving around soo fast and completing work but neglecting my health. There is so much I want to do with Allyson and go to places with Jasper and her.
Well, let me rest for these two weeks and see what I should do with my life. With the house and a kid, it's not easy to just give up our present jobs and go do something else which we both would really love to haahhah :)
During the time when I was hospitalised, thanks to wonderful family members and colleagues and good friends' support and concern. Many thanks to my own hubby Jasper for washing clothes and hanging them too :)
I was warded for high fever (39.7 degree celsius) and bad back pain which doctors suspect to be kidney infection. After all the blood tests, urine tests, I was found to have stones in both my kidneys. Doc says no danger at the moment, just have to observe for another bout of high fever or severe back pain. A slight portion of my left kidney is a bit swollen and till now after discharge, I still feel the occasional bearable back pain. I was given 2 weeks hospitalisation leave to rest at home. The cause? Probably too much of calcium since I've been a dairy lover since young.
The stay in the hospital was depressing. I was telling Jasper that so long as I do not have fever, I would rather be at home resting than stay in the hospital. Every day, there's someone coming in to the room that I'm staying. Some of them came in very very distressed. The rest of the patients who have been staying for quite a while didn't look too good.
The ward that I was in is under Urology. Most of the patients who were in that ward were moving around with the urine bags. It could be kidney failure or probably other illnesses.
It was surprising that many of them in the ward were rather young people maybe in their early thirties to mid-forties. There was a young man in his early twenties there too. Of cos there were a few elderly but what dawned on me was illnesses are attacking the rather young.
I was wondering, at this age, it should be a world of discovery. There's so much to do. Time shouldn't be spent living the rest of the days in the hospital. My stay in the hospital made me realise that I should take things slower than what I'm doing now. What's the point of moving around soo fast and completing work but neglecting my health. There is so much I want to do with Allyson and go to places with Jasper and her.
Well, let me rest for these two weeks and see what I should do with my life. With the house and a kid, it's not easy to just give up our present jobs and go do something else which we both would really love to haahhah :)
During the time when I was hospitalised, thanks to wonderful family members and colleagues and good friends' support and concern. Many thanks to my own hubby Jasper for washing clothes and hanging them too :)
Friday, July 11, 2008
Welcoming the Weekend
It's Friday and I'm surprised that I feel quite happy and not too tired this week. The happy vibes are in me this whole week hehehe. Hope the vibes will be left in my body for the rest of my life hahah.
I just called to enrol Allyson into a play gym. She's soooo active so I thought it would be nice to just let her go have some fun. It's a trial session so no need to commit too early.
Every time when I'm free, I like to look at her 'mushroom' head photograph ahhaha. Really uplifts my spirits. Must develop the pics for my family members especially my mum lighten her spirits up and relax more :))
We are thinking of taking a short break in September. Hotels here are very expensive cos F1 is starting. My favourite hotel is out of the question. Checked out the pricing and realised it's more worth it if I take my money overseas haahah
Wonder what we shall come up with. Jasper suggested Sentosa and I'm already thinking of the nice Spa hotel hahah wonder if we should part with the money ;p
I shall go back to my marking now while waiting for Jasper :))
Wishing everyone a happy weekend!!!
I just called to enrol Allyson into a play gym. She's soooo active so I thought it would be nice to just let her go have some fun. It's a trial session so no need to commit too early.
Every time when I'm free, I like to look at her 'mushroom' head photograph ahhaha. Really uplifts my spirits. Must develop the pics for my family members especially my mum lighten her spirits up and relax more :))
We are thinking of taking a short break in September. Hotels here are very expensive cos F1 is starting. My favourite hotel is out of the question. Checked out the pricing and realised it's more worth it if I take my money overseas haahah
Wonder what we shall come up with. Jasper suggested Sentosa and I'm already thinking of the nice Spa hotel hahah wonder if we should part with the money ;p
I shall go back to my marking now while waiting for Jasper :))
Wishing everyone a happy weekend!!!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Beautiful July
Don't know what came over me but I feel extremely cheerful today. I'm not sure if it's cos of the weather or maybe I've become wiser and learnt to take things easier. hahah :)
The picnic last Sunday was interesting hahaha. Our families enjoyed ourselves especially my niece Sammi who build sandcastles with my brother and sister-in-law. East Coast Beach is not very clean so we brought our mats and table covers to make sure that we have a decent place to sit. Allyson had a bit of fun too watching people cycle, blade and run by. It was quite a short gathering. We managed to have some food...luckily!! cos after that there was heavy downpour. there were at least 5 families hiding under a miserable shelter hahahah. We had to open our umbrellas to shelter ourselves from the rain. We were at the Big Splash area. Nevertheless, we had a bit of fun and most importantly, a mini get-together for both the in laws heehhe :)
This coming Sunday, we are celebrating Sammi's birthday. She is four years old this year and my mum bought her a cake. Sammi chose the Thomas the Train pattern. Quite surprising for a girl hehehe wonder what our Allyson will choose next year hahahah
Our little allyson has just cut her hair. We took her to the salon beside our flat. It costs about $5 and I must say the hairstylist's skills is excellent! Within 5 minutes, Allyson had her hair cut and there was minimal stray hairs on her neck and clothing. Allyson's hairstyle is termed as the 'mushroom head'.
She trying to walk on her own but she needs to hold on to our hands or the wall. She seems very afraid to fall. She could stand up with both her hands raised when she's on our bed but when she comes to the cold hard floor, she doesn't dare to stand up. Some relatives commented why she couldn't walk as she's already coming to 15 months. I seriously don't know how to react. I guess it's best for her to stand on her own two feet when she's ready. What we can do is to practise walking around the house with her and when we are outside. She gets really excited but at the same time, a little lazy. She would rather crawl more than walk a few more steps.
I'm really looking forward to a nice Saturday with my buddies hehehehe without Allyson and Jasper around. My gal buddies and I are going for hi-tea and then wine shopping and we are thinking of booking a hotel room for the night so that we could just talk our hearts out hahahah.
I've longed for a day like that. I guess this is what they call 'ME TIME'.
I will definitely miss Allyson and Jasper but I guess I need a break. It so happened that Jasper has something on that Saturday and we can request for Allyson's grandparents to take care of her. Let's hope there will be no hiccups. I'm soooooooooo looking forward to that weekend.
The picnic last Sunday was interesting hahaha. Our families enjoyed ourselves especially my niece Sammi who build sandcastles with my brother and sister-in-law. East Coast Beach is not very clean so we brought our mats and table covers to make sure that we have a decent place to sit. Allyson had a bit of fun too watching people cycle, blade and run by. It was quite a short gathering. We managed to have some food...luckily!! cos after that there was heavy downpour. there were at least 5 families hiding under a miserable shelter hahahah. We had to open our umbrellas to shelter ourselves from the rain. We were at the Big Splash area. Nevertheless, we had a bit of fun and most importantly, a mini get-together for both the in laws heehhe :)
This coming Sunday, we are celebrating Sammi's birthday. She is four years old this year and my mum bought her a cake. Sammi chose the Thomas the Train pattern. Quite surprising for a girl hehehe wonder what our Allyson will choose next year hahahah
Our little allyson has just cut her hair. We took her to the salon beside our flat. It costs about $5 and I must say the hairstylist's skills is excellent! Within 5 minutes, Allyson had her hair cut and there was minimal stray hairs on her neck and clothing. Allyson's hairstyle is termed as the 'mushroom head'.
She trying to walk on her own but she needs to hold on to our hands or the wall. She seems very afraid to fall. She could stand up with both her hands raised when she's on our bed but when she comes to the cold hard floor, she doesn't dare to stand up. Some relatives commented why she couldn't walk as she's already coming to 15 months. I seriously don't know how to react. I guess it's best for her to stand on her own two feet when she's ready. What we can do is to practise walking around the house with her and when we are outside. She gets really excited but at the same time, a little lazy. She would rather crawl more than walk a few more steps.
I'm really looking forward to a nice Saturday with my buddies hehehehe without Allyson and Jasper around. My gal buddies and I are going for hi-tea and then wine shopping and we are thinking of booking a hotel room for the night so that we could just talk our hearts out hahahah.
I've longed for a day like that. I guess this is what they call 'ME TIME'.
I will definitely miss Allyson and Jasper but I guess I need a break. It so happened that Jasper has something on that Saturday and we can request for Allyson's grandparents to take care of her. Let's hope there will be no hiccups. I'm soooooooooo looking forward to that weekend.
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