Family / Kinship

Sometimes, I wonder what exactly does the word family mean? To some people, family probably only means to share the good times and despise the bad times. I'm not sure if everyone else feels the same.

I was brought up in a family where my brother and I were taught to protect and take care of each other. Just last week, my mother told me that I've only got one brother and if they were to pass on, we should take good care of each other and look out for each other. My brother and I are quite close. Whenever anything happens, we keep each other in the loop. Just two weeks ago when I was warded, my brother visited me twice. Once on his own and another time with my sis-in-law and niece. Whenever anything happens in the family, be it monetary or just support, we really take care of each other. When I had bleeding while expecting Allyson, I was soo upset. While waiting for Jasper to drive the car up to the porch, I called my brother and after that, he called a few times to make sure I was alright.

From young, my parents, my brother and I never quarrelled over money. To my parents, as long as we have enough to spend and lead a simple life, money should not be a big issue and the cause of quarrels in the family. I believe it's not the same for other parents. Some parents tend to see money in a very very big way. When their children are late in transferring a monthly allowance, they haunt their children like some loansharks. They can't even be bothered to ask politely or check if their children are sufficient themselves. What's most upsetting is if these parents are working themselves, then it dawned on us why they are sooooo uptight over money not being transferred on time when they have a steady stream of income coming in every month. It's ok for outsiders not to understand what their children are going through but these are parents!! If these parents can't even understand their own children's difficulties, then what does the word FAMILY mean at all??? Is it worth it to fall out with their own children just becos of money?!?? Isn't there any other things that are worth considering besides MONEY MONEY all the time!??!

It really breaks one's heart sometimes to hear such stories. Don't these parents ever consider that their children have their own families to feed. Given the rising costs in Singapore these days and the salary not being too high to meet these rising costs, can't these parents be more understanding?? I think these parents are better off being LOANSHARKS then being parents. If they are soooooo hard up for money, then they should not have gotten married at all and just go earn whatever money they want till the day they are being laid in the coffin!!! *ANGER*

I realised that my parents are very understanding. They have never expected us to feed them or transfer money to them. We give a monthly allowance every month to my mother and becos my dad is working, we only give him extras when we get bonus or during his birthdays. Of cos, mum gets part of our bonus and angpows as well :)) Whenever we need their help to look after Allyson, they agree wholeheartedly and in turn ask if she needs to eat anything so they can go to the market and buy them fresh. I felt very very touched. My parents don't talk much but when it comes to a time when we need their help, they try their very best. My mum kept telling me that one of her regrets is not able to look after Allyson on her own. My mother is the panicky sort so it's not wise to leave her with a child who can't articulate what she wants till much later. Moreover, she doesn't have the experience to look after young children. She doesn't mind to look after when Allyson turns 3-4 years old and is able to be quite independent.

Given the rising costs, I'm looking at ways and means to cut cost and save more money. I intend to take up one or two tuition assignments and add some extra money to our household income.
Wish me luck!!! :))